Hatred for tomatoes: JUSTIFIED
“Oh, and can I get that with no tomatoes?”
I feel like a child whenever I order something at a restaurant and ask them to leave off the tomatoes. I have nothing against the flavor—I love tomato sauce and even sun-dried tomatoes—I just hate the texture.
And the seeds… THE SEEDS!!! They’re like little bits of evil swimming around in a pool of vile goo. At least, that’s what I’d assumed since I’d never actually eaten a tomato. Until yesterday; a day that will live in infamy.
My friends Ryan & Chelsea hosted a House Warming/Memorial Day/Bob’s Birthday BBQ at their new house and the usual group of people were in attendance. There was one random guy, but Bob vouched for him and he’d brought some homemade pasta salad with him. Instant winner in my book.
I made myself a plate with a skirt steak sandwich, some of Laine’s famous baked mac ‘n cheese, and new guy’s pasta salad as triple carbs is the only way to roll on a 3-day weekend. Everything was delicious and I was very much enjoying my meal. I stabbed something that looked convincingly like a misshapen peperoncini (see above) with my fork and popped it in my mouth and then I made a face that I’m not proud of. It’s that face you make when you think you’ve taken a sip of your un-sweet iced tea, but it’s actually your friends Diet Coke. Times a million.
A lesser woman would’ve spit it out into a napkin. I swallowed, shuddered, and moved on to the mac ‘n cheese.
Some stealthy recon on Ryan’s part revealed the offending food item to be a pear tomato. It should be illegal for tomatoes to disguise themselves as other, non-offensive fruits and/or vegetables. I mean, look at this asshole:
Green grape tomato?! Talk about wolf in sheep’s clothing.
