{3 notes}

This is going to be one of those embarrassing orders when they see I’m one person.

— 

Me, taking down Adam’s order for Taco Bell drive-thru.

Their Cantina Tacos are so good I’m having them two nights in a row. Fuck your judgment.

{3 notes}

This is going to be one of those embarrassing orders when they see I’m one person.

— 

Me, taking down Adam’s order for Taco Bell drive-thru.

Their Cantina Tacos are so good I’m having them two nights in a row. Fuck your judgment.

{Notes}
I’ll be uploading pics to flickr when I get back, but for now, here’s a sampling of what my vacation has been about: CARBS. From left, clockwise: brusccheta, bowties pomodoro, penne alfredo, ham pizza, eggplant (one of these things is not like the other…), rice, spring roll.

I’ll be uploading pics to flickr when I get back, but for now, here’s a sampling of what my vacation has been about: CARBS.

From left, clockwise: brusccheta, bowties pomodoro, penne alfredo, ham pizza, eggplant (one of these things is not like the other…), rice, spring roll.

{1 note}
A few weeks ago, I added “Special surprise day trip for Adam” on our shared calendar. I had read about the Star Trek Live exhibit at the Kennedy Space Center and figured that was right up his Trekkie alley. I also had a hankering for rock shrimp and Dixie Crossroads is just 20 minutes away from KSC, so the day basically planned itself.

A few weeks ago, I added “Special surprise day trip for Adam” on our shared calendar. I had read about the Star Trek Live exhibit at the Kennedy Space Center and figured that was right up his Trekkie alley.

I also had a hankering for rock shrimp and Dixie Crossroads is just 20 minutes away from KSC, so the day basically planned itself.

{2 notes}
You’re killing me, Orlando. This is from Orlando Weekly’s “Best of Orlando 2010” which is determined by reader votes. Other gems include: Starbucks Coffee - Multiple locations for 2nd best coffee house and Chili’s Grill & Bar - Multiple locations for 2nd best happy hour.

You’re killing me, Orlando.

This is from Orlando Weekly’s “Best of Orlando 2010” which is determined by reader votes.

Other gems include: Starbucks Coffee - Multiple locations for 2nd best coffee house and Chili’s Grill & Bar - Multiple locations for 2nd best happy hour.

I am not a cake person

{Notes}

Which is to say that I do not get excited about cake. I can appreciate what a cake can sometimes represent—the passing of a year, the union of two people who love each other—but I just don’t get cake as an object of culinary desire.

Whenever we have a birthday in the office, I dutifully make my way down to the conference room and ask for a “very thin slice” which I can then poke with my fork a couple of times. I’ll make chit-chat while I pick around the frosting and throw away about 90% of my serving.

Don’t even get me started on cake-batter-flavored ice cream.

Having said all that, I just had the most intense craving for a chocolate cake that I ate in the 5th grade.* We were doing show-and-tell and one of they boys in my class brought in a cake that he had baked himself.

In the 5th grade, I’m pretty sure that the extent of my cooking skills involved boiling water for pasta and microwaving Kraft singles over Tostitos. This bamf had baked a damned cake. Not just any cake; the only cake this self-proclaimed non-cake person has ever craved.

Full disclosure: In hopes of getting the recipe, I totally just tried to track down the guy on both FaceBook and pipl.com, but it’s looking like he’s gone off-grid. I doubt that his parents still live in the same house, so the fact that I remember his phone number probably wouldn’t help either. Don’t look at me like I’m some Rainman aspie freak: the first 3 digits were the same as mine and the last 4 digits spelled out COOL.

* I just realized that the 5th grade was 18 years ago. This “time” thing is a fucking bitch.

{Notes}
Hatred for tomatoes: JUSTIFIED “Oh, and can I get that with no tomatoes?” I feel like a child whenever I order something at a restaurant and ask them to leave off the tomatoes. I have nothing against the flavor—I love tomato sauce and even sun-dried tomatoes—I just hate the texture. And the seeds… THE SEEDS!!! They’re like little bits of evil swimming around in a pool of vile goo. At least, that’s what I’d assumed since I’d never actually eaten a tomato. Until yesterday; a day that will live in infamy. My friends Ryan & Chelsea hosted a House Warming/Memorial Day/Bob’s Birthday BBQ at their new house and the usual group of people were in attendance. There was one random guy, but Bob vouched for him and he’d brought some homemade pasta salad with him. Instant winner in my book. I made myself a plate with a skirt steak sandwich, some of Laine’s famous baked mac ‘n cheese, and new guy’s pasta salad as triple carbs is the only way to roll on a 3-day weekend. Everything was delicious and I was very much enjoying my meal. I stabbed something that looked convincingly like a misshapen peperoncini (see above) with my fork and popped it in my mouth and then I made a face that I’m not proud of. It’s that face you make when you think you’ve taken a sip of your un-sweet iced tea, but it’s actually your friends Diet Coke. Times a million. A lesser woman would’ve spit it out into a napkin. I swallowed, shuddered, and moved on to the mac ‘n cheese. Some stealthy recon on Ryan’s part revealed the offending food item to be a pear tomato. It should be illegal for tomatoes to disguise themselves as other, non-offensive fruits and/or vegetables. I mean, look at this asshole: Green grape tomato?! Talk about wolf in sheep’s clothing.

Hatred for tomatoes: JUSTIFIED

“Oh, and can I get that with no tomatoes?”

I feel like a child whenever I order something at a restaurant and ask them to leave off the tomatoes. I have nothing against the flavor—I love tomato sauce and even sun-dried tomatoes—I just hate the texture.

And the seeds… THE SEEDS!!! They’re like little bits of evil swimming around in a pool of vile goo. At least, that’s what I’d assumed since I’d never actually eaten a tomato. Until yesterday; a day that will live in infamy.

My friends Ryan & Chelsea hosted a House Warming/Memorial Day/Bob’s Birthday BBQ at their new house and the usual group of people were in attendance. There was one random guy, but Bob vouched for him and he’d brought some homemade pasta salad with him. Instant winner in my book.

I made myself a plate with a skirt steak sandwich, some of Laine’s famous baked mac ‘n cheese, and new guy’s pasta salad as triple carbs is the only way to roll on a 3-day weekend. Everything was delicious and I was very much enjoying my meal. I stabbed something that looked convincingly like a misshapen peperoncini (see above) with my fork and popped it in my mouth and then I made a face that I’m not proud of. It’s that face you make when you think you’ve taken a sip of your un-sweet iced tea, but it’s actually your friends Diet Coke. Times a million.

A lesser woman would’ve spit it out into a napkin. I swallowed, shuddered, and moved on to the mac ‘n cheese.

Some stealthy recon on Ryan’s part revealed the offending food item to be a pear tomato. It should be illegal for tomatoes to disguise themselves as other, non-offensive fruits and/or vegetables. I mean, look at this asshole:

Green Grape Tomato

Green grape tomato?! Talk about wolf in sheep’s clothing.

{121 notes}
mykicks: dailyseinfeld: Jerry: So I didn’t like the crest all that much., but the guy spent fifteen minutes with me so to get out of the store I told I wanted to see what someone else thought….And then he makes a face like he doesn’t believe me.Elaine: Ah! So he knew that you were making it up.!Jerry: Yeah….. He caught me. So here’s what I want you to do. Come back with me to the store and we’ll pretend to look at the coat.Elaine: That’s ridiculous. Why do do you want to go back there if you don’t want the coat?Jerry: Because he thinks I was lying and I want to show him I wasn’t.Elaine: But you were!!Jerry: But if you go back with me , then I’m not. (via The Wig Master) Bulletproof logic. What ever happened to Clearly Canadian sparkling fruit-flavored water? Peach was my favorite. I guess they’re still around, but their bottles don’t look as cool as they did in the ’90s:

mykicks:

dailyseinfeld:

Jerry: So I didn’t like the crest all that much., but the guy spent fifteen minutes with me so to get out of the store I told I wanted to see what someone else thought….And then he makes a face like he doesn’t believe me.
Elaine: Ah! So he knew that you were making it up.!
Jerry: Yeah….. He caught me. So here’s what I want you to do. Come back with me to the store and we’ll pretend to look at the coat.
Elaine: That’s ridiculous. Why do do you want to go back there if you don’t want the coat?
Jerry: Because he thinks I was lying and I want to show him I wasn’t.
Elaine: But you were!!
Jerry: But if you go back with me , then I’m not.

(via The Wig Master)

Bulletproof logic.

What ever happened to Clearly Canadian sparkling fruit-flavored water? Peach was my favorite.

I guess they’re still around, but their bottles don’t look as cool as they did in the ’90s:

Orchard Peach Clearly Canadian

{423 notes}
chelsealeigh: thisiswhyyourefat: Pizza Hut Crown Pizza A Pizza Hut Supreme pizza with meatballs and cream cheese balls baked into the crust and shaped like a crown.  (submitted by Mira via Pizza Hut) I hope Marcela hasn’t eaten dinner yet, because I know she’ll be running out to buy this asap. I refuse to believe this thing exists. Also, anytime that Chelsea reblogs a Pizza Hut-themed ThisIsWhyYourFat post, I just know I’m going to be mentioned in it.

chelsealeigh:

thisiswhyyourefat:

Pizza Hut Crown Pizza

A Pizza Hut Supreme pizza with meatballs and cream cheese balls baked into the crust and shaped like a crown. 

(submitted by Mira via Pizza Hut)

I hope Marcela hasn’t eaten dinner yet, because I know she’ll be running out to buy this asap.

I refuse to believe this thing exists.

Also, anytime that Chelsea reblogs a Pizza Hut-themed ThisIsWhyYourFat post, I just know I’m going to be mentioned in it.